Tough questions from a 3-year old…
On Sunday, we went to my mom’s to help her out for a bit. Preparing for a yard sale,getting stuff together for that, and such. Autumn, my super adorable niece was there when we arrived, returning from a walk around the neighborhood with Grandmommy. My mom told me that when she arrived that morning, she said “Pop Pops doesn’t live here anymore?”. She had not been to my mom’s in awhile and walking in she could see that my dad’s desk was not in it’s usual spot. Such a precocious little girl. Later on, I was out in the garage and she followed me out and she pointed to my dad’s wheelchair. She said to me, “Is that Pop Pops thing?” I said yes it is, it’s his wheelchair. She then told me he didn’t need it anymore. “No honey, he doesn’t”, I said to her. She then said he doesn’t need it because he’s in heaven. That’s right, he doesn’t need it in heaven.
Such a smart little girl she is, very tuned-in to things happening around her. She knows Pop Pops was sick in the hospital and afterwards, she knows we went to the beach to throw roses in the water for him. A couple weeks ago we went to the beach to watch the sunset, my mom, Autumn, and I. On our way there, I told her we were going to the beach and she asked if we were going to throw roses in the water again. My heart just swelled.
I am glad that Autumn knew who Pop Pops was and will hopefully remember the memories she has of him as she gets older. There are adorable photos of the two of them, even more special now. And there will always be reminders of him around.
It is sad that my dad will not see Autumn grow up, or Cooper and Cole. He knew and loved Cooper, always had a smile to match the smile on Cooper’s face. He did not get to meet Cole, born the day before my dad was rushed back to the hospital, two weeks before he passed away. But he did see a photo of him on the cell phone and smiled so I am confident that he knew who he was and loved him.
One thing is for sure, Pop Pops will always be looking down on Autumn, and Cooper and Cole, just as he is the rest of us. I sure wish he was here with us, but since he can’t be, I take comfort in knowing he is looking down on us and will be a part of us wherever we go.
I love and miss you very much, Daddy….